Last week was kind of a blur. I met with the PS on Thursday and he gave me a once over (made sure my chest was rock hard--if only it were my abs that were) and we scheduled my exchange surgery for June 10. I was excited to get the surgery at the beginning of the summer and learn that I wouldn't need drains. I was so happy to hear this!!!!
Then my mood took a turn. I didn't get another injection and it felt strange. Not that I'm going for Dolly Partten or anything, but I assumed I'd get a little more in-- especially since we talked about doing it the week before. Also, I've had many people tell me to go bigger than I think I'll want. Easier said then done when I have no idea what I want or what this mess will look like when it is fixed up. UGH! So, I left the office and felt uneasy, anxious and completely unsure. I mean, if I'm going through all this pain and discomfort I better like these babies. : ) I called a close friend who has had surgery and talked with her and even looked at a picture of what she looks like in a swimsuit. Wow, talk about a good friend. I couldn't stop thinking about my decision so I called the PS and talked with Nikki. She told me to come in the following week and we would do another injection. I immediately felt better. So, on Monday morning I will get another injection.....maybe my last one, but who knows. I definitely didn't think this part would be as hard as it is for me.
Life has been good since I skipped a week of injections. I can even sleep on my side for a few minutes before it hurts. It just feels good to move from my back. I can't wait until I can see the chiropractor again! I will need to be put back together. I also have been able to workout and run a little more. Nothing like I'm used to, but at least it is something. I'm quickly realizing that these 5+ pounds are going to take me longer to get off then I'd like.
Reality check. We are house sitting and the teenage son was outside playing basketball with our family. He came up behind me with full intentions of being playful, fun and showing his love.... and gave me a HUGE bear hug. All I could do was yell, "You can't do that! You can't do that! You can't do that!" I think he was in shock and didn't know what to do. Brian encouraged him to let go of me and I held in my tears and prayed I wouldn't fall over. I knew he had no idea what he had done and he felt bad. I seriously thought my arms and chest wouldn't go back to their original spots and that the throbbing would last forever. I also kept checking to make sure my chest wasn't deflating. I recovered and talked to him about it. He knew I had surgery, but he quickly learned what that meant. He felt bad, but it was all good. Now he knows not to give me bear hugs until I let him know it is ok. I realized that just because people know I had surgery, it doesn't mean they know what these crazy expanders feel like and how painful it can be.
Well, time to go to bed. I will check in again on Monday and let you know how my injection goes. Hopefully I will have a better feeling when I leave this time.
Can't believe just yesterday you were asking me about mastectomy prep and now your already set up for your Exchange! Woo Hoo!!!
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