Bad Day

I almost feel guilty telling about my horrible couple of days when I know so many people who are dealing with such major things in their lives right now. So, I will keep it short and as positive as my mind can be (I'm so tired and emotional).

* Had 50 cc's injected yesterday
* Didn't sleep at all because I was so uncomfortable and had pains in my arms and ribs.
* Took pain meds and muscle relaxant and it did nothing for me. Still no sleep.
* Dream about ripping my expanders out....a lot.
* Realize I have a ways to go with these things in and get a little depressed.
* Remind myself I opted to do this and it is a good thing.
* Still feel sad.........and fat.
* Feel as though someone is squeezing me tight and/or sitting on my chest when I breath
* Dreading going to bed now and praying I get some sleep--for my sake and my kids
* End the day with a Shamrock Shake--that's as Irish as it gets in our house.

Positive note: My kids have been so good at not hugging me tightly and being gentle when they are around me. Since my surgery we've done a lot of hand-holding, which I love. Last night, Haddon was upset and came into bed and grabbed my hand to hold it and tonight at a movie, Brady grabbed my hand and hugged it to his face. I love my kids. Just gentle reminders of why I did this surgery!!!